Key claim #1: We human beings “live in language.” That is, we all have a little voice inside and for many of us, the little voice is rarely – if ever – silent!
Key claim #2: Language creates and generates, it does not simply describe. Because of the creative dimension of language, this internal conversation has immense impact, obviously, on the quality of our lives, in a number of different areas.
In personal coaching relationships, one particular aspect of our internal narrative is virtually always explored: that of Beliefs. We create beliefs in virtually every area of our lives, not simply in the areas of spirituality or religion. We have beliefs about money, men and women… cultures, cars and companies. We have beliefs about ourselves and what we can and can’t be, do or have... and about our spouses and their intentions. We have beliefs about our kids and their friends, and about the past, present and future. We even have beliefs about beliefs!
Many of us spend a lifetime living and looking “through” our beliefs, and never look “at” them.
In this way of thinking, if you never see your beliefs as beliefs, you don’t have them – they have you!
Because our beliefs directly impact both our subjective experience (“what it feels like to be me”) and our objective results (the actions we actually take in the world), they are worth exploring and questioning.
I invite you to consider the following questions as you flex the Big Eye and look at your beliefs:
- What are 3 beliefs you have about yourself?
- What are 3 beliefs you have about ______? (any other person who’s important in your life)
- What are 3 beliefs you have about money?
- What are 3 beliefs you have about ______? (any other important aspect of your life)
As you reflect on these key beliefs, consider: Are these beliefs serving you? Are they helpful?
That is, are they moving you toward the Results you say you want, or not?
Have you shared these beliefs with those closest to you? How did you originally come up with these beliefs?
Have you ever updated these beliefs? Are there any obstacles that might prevent you from updating these beliefs? What might be different or possible if you were to update one or more of these beliefs?
One of the biggest barriers to successfully updating "un-powerful" or "un-helpful" beliefs is this: We don't see them as beliefs in the first place! We see them as "the way things are." Until and unless we can shift here, we are powerless to change our beliefs... and we will be unable to see the new possibilities for action that new beliefs open us to.
The invitation here is to become a more powerful observer of your beliefs, and to be fully conscious of your own role as the author.